Iago Faustus wrote this story and its narrative light verses, and the story was illustrated by Dark Vasili, whom you can support on Patreon: patreon.com/DarkVasili.

Verse:

Poor Second Agent! It’s awful straining
When we her ugly fate avow.
Five million dollars’ agent training
Make fifty kilos octo-chow.

They’ll send a Third, our fine elite.
Even if their costs are growing.
They must keep all things discreet.
And keep the world from wrongful knowing.